William Cowper (1731-1800)

This ev'ning, Delia, you and I

This ev'ning, Delia, you and I,
Have manag'd most delightfully,
For with a frown we parted;

Performative Argument

Notice how the lovers deliberately stage a minor conflict. This isn't a real fight, but a calculated social dance.

Having contrived some trifle that
We both may be much troubled at,
And sadly disconcerted.
Yet well as each perform'd their part,
We might perceive it was but art,

Relationship as Performance

Cowper reveals the strategic nature of romantic tension—arguments are a kind of intimacy, carefully managed.

And that we both intended
To sacrifice a little ease;
For all such petty flaws as these
Are made but to be mended.
You knew, Dissembler! all the while,
How sweet it was to reconcile
After this heavy pelt;
That we should gain by this allay
When next we met, and laugh away
The care we never felt.
Happy! when we but seek t' endure
A little pain, then find a cure
By double joy requited;

Metaphorical Healing

Friendship/love compared to a bone mending—trauma makes connections stronger when repaired correctly.

For friendship, like a sever'd bone,
Improves and joins a stronger tone
When aptly reunited.
Source Wikipedia Poetry Foundation

Reading Notes

The Choreography of Romantic Conflict

Cowper exposes courtship as a deliberate performance, where lovers strategically manufacture tension to create moments of reconciliation. The poem isn't about genuine anger, but about the ritualized dance of romantic interaction.

The lovers here are sophisticated performers, understanding that minor conflicts can actually strengthen emotional bonds. By manufacturing a 'trifle' to argue about, they create an opportunity for sweet reunion.

18th Century Emotional Mechanics

[CONTEXT: This reflects libertine poetry's fascination with emotional calculation]. Cowper demonstrates how emotional management was a refined social skill in the 18th century. Lovers don't just feel—they choreograph feelings with precision.

The metaphor of the 'sever'd bone' is particularly brilliant: emotional rupture, when healed, can make connections fundamentally stronger.